My Angel

I believe each of us has an angel of our own. I feel my angel is brown-eyed, a little mischievous and always has a smile on its face. I'm not sure if it's a he or a she. All I know is that it has tried to infect me with its youthful enthusiasm and love for life for the longest time. It has tried to infuse in me the humour that my dry, usually sardonic countenance can't quite accept. It has tried to rub off in me its exuberance in things good and beautiful.

Well, for the beautiful part I believe I can accept. I am not an artist in any way. Well, at least not the visual artist. Nor am I good at kinesthetic art. I don't know how to dance. I tried to do lap dance once (haha!) with my siblings for an audience and what a sight I was. Ask them how bad or passable it was and they'll try to be kind. Even then, I appreciate beauty in all its form. I like to look at paintings. I can appreciate good music and I love to read. I do consider books an art form. Well, isn't it?

Going back to my angel, I imagine it to be my opposite. It has a graceful air about itself. It carries itself well and definitely has flesh in all the right places unlike my skinny self. It probably has a violin or a guitar with it instead of the usual harp. It could even be dressed simply. What I'm certain about is its eye color - brown. Why the fascination for brown eyes? I don't know. Or maybe I do...

It still has a lot of work to do with me. Like the angel of Azucena in The Law of Love, it surely is having a hard time making me listen to its voice. You see, I can be as hardheaded as Azucena herself. Well, the book is another story though. I guess at this point I am trying to be in touch with my angel. I will try to listen more closely or to be quiet more often. That way, I may find it easier to discern what it is trying to tell me. I'd give an account if I do get to the point of being in touch with my brown-eyed angel.