I have loved, was heartbroken, was made whole and then broken again.
I have arrived, left and returned to that place everybody yearns to go to.
I have lived as I wanted only to find myself wondering if it is a life that I really wanted.
I have known people, forgotten some and placed others in special corners of my heart.

It wasn’t always easy to be good and generous and good-natured.
It wasn’t always easy to be bad and unmannerly either.
There has to be a balance of the yin and yan in a person’s being.
It is making that balance that sometimes renders me spent, confused and angry.
It is the effort in taking things lightly, in living life in stride that I find not so difficult.
And so I remain as complacent as I possibly could, carefree and oftentimes careless with the trivial decisions I need to make.
It is in living a life or a semi-life that has made me stay in this place and do what I’ve been doing for several years now.
It is the apathy, the enjoyment or the lack of genuine joy that I stayed.

This is a crossroad, a stop. I need to make a decision soon enough. To stay for good or leave for someplace I can find another part of myself. As I’ve turned to a million pieces once, I’ve started to be whole and there are other pieces I have yet to find again.

It is a journey not worth a dent in the cyberspace. Yet I choose to vent, to talk, to impose. It is a piece of thought, a piece of my mind, a preoccupation at a time when better things are left undone in its place. So it has to be worth a minute. It has to be out there, right here.